~Plato
For those of you who don't know me very well, you might not know that before doing the Peace Corps or getting my MA, I was, in fact, "teaching for America." Although things did not go as I planned with Teach for America and I ended up resigning, I still learned a lot from the little time I did spend in that program, and while in the end it wasn't for me, I still think it is a great idea with a lot of potential (problems as well, but still great potential) and I met many amazing people in the short time I spent in TFA. I also learned a great deal from this experience...one useful phrase I learned was, "seek to understand"...
If we just take people's words and actions as they are without seeking to understand the true meaning behind these, or without trying to understand other people or other cultures, we will never really know that person, who they are, or what their culture is...we will never really know why they are the way they are or why they do and say the things they do. (kind of sounds like basic psychology but so easy to overlook) This little saying, "seek to understand" has come quite in handy during my time thus far in Guatemala. Sometimes, especially after many a frustrating event, I forget to seek to understand. However, sooner or later it always pops back into my mind.
For those of you following my blog, you will remember that I had been having some frustrating experiences throughout November. Right before Thanksgiving I had my first minor meltdown (I was actually quite proud of myself...it took me about 4 months before I cried or threw up in the Peace Corps! haha!). I was having a rough time both at home and at work. I felt little support from either end, and then, right before Thanksgiving, I got really sick. Dealing with racist comments, an absentee counterpart (The guatemalan who I am assigned to work with for 2 years, who is supposed to help me and be my partner), and feeling like death were all just too much for me to handle...
I broke down. I started crying and my host mom came into my room. She thought someone had died because I could not speak, nor could I stop sobbing hysterically, and quite loudly. I was a mess. I told her how I had been feeling and how I was sick, and she didn't say anything; she just gave me a big hug, and told me everything would be alright and that every problem had a solution. I think in that instant, she realized I was only human and was going through a lot and needed some support.
Needless to say, the racist comments have stopped. As for my counterpart, once she found out I was sick, she was actually very supportive and personable! We hugged for like the first time, and I think her walls have started to come down. I have learned a lot about her these past two weeks, and let's just say that she has her share of problems, as does my host mom and host family, in general. Neither she, nor my host mom have had the easiest of lives...and I am trying to understand their points of view and learn more about them.
As frustrated, sick, sad, homesick, fed up with living abroad, etc., as I get sometimes, I try to remember that we are all human and we are all batting through our own demons. Sometimes we get so caught up in our own problems that we can't understand any one else's situation; however, we are all connected by our humanity and the fact that we can empathize with one another, support one another, and learn from one another, and for me, this lesson, though simple, is one that helps me every day.
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